Autism: Communication in a family with an Autism diagnosis.

When my son Douglas was diagnosed with Autism we were devastated. He had started to turn within himself and he had pretty much quit talking all together. Most of his time was spent staring at his movies, often we physically had to touch him and even turn his head and raise our voices slightly to break the spell he seemed to be under. He wouldn't repeat after us, he wouldn't interact with us, and he never made attempts to communicate his needs or wants. Life became rough because we had to make sure all his needs were met, we were trying to ensure his desires were met, we wanted to love and spoil him, but it felt like we were losing him instead.

Thankfully we had an amazing support system in place. It gave us time to rethink strategies, there were people we could draw on for assistance, and it allowed us to regroup and begin anew. As we consulted with all of the different specialists and doctors they begin to tell us that we could use many creative ways to break down the barriers in the communication between our son and us. There were several things we learn to use one was pictures and Velcro boards that Douglas could use to communicate, another was sign language that he could feel as he talked, and last was to simply be more in his world and try to understand his point of views and anticipate his way of thinking. It was at this point that we decided that we were going to be a part of his world since he did not want to be a part of ours.

It was amazing how quickly he took to sign language. Quickly we begin to talk with our son again, the joy and love was being restored. Next we started instituting the picture boards. Douglas once again took to these and was able to communicate his needs and desires to us. We had various boards in different areas for example in the kitchen; we had a board on the refrigerator with some of his favorite foods. He would take us there and place the picture of his want in the want place to communicate that desire or need. As we got comfortable with these and our communication grew, we begin to work on reinforcing the words for each sign or picture.

We spent hours on end playing his games with him, watching the shows he watched, and just letting him show us whatever it was he wanted to show. By participating and not pushing he accepted us as part of his world and our bond and relationship grew. Before we knew it we had our loving, hugging, and sweet little boy back. Yes we don't talk like some families, yes we might not act like other people, and yes we aren't the typical American traditional poster family, but what we are is a close loving family that understands our needs and abilities to depend and rely on one another. Our children know we are there, they know we will do what it takes, and they trust us unconditionally because we go the extra mile to learn about them.

I love Scooby Doo, I love Bugs Bunny, and I love many of the other cartoons. We know the Barney songs, we can sing along with the Wiggles, and I know every word to the Toy Story movies as well as many others. It took us a long time, many hours of television, lots of music, days of frustration and tears, but when his words came we could not have been happier. I know every kid is different and our methods may not work. These are just a few things that we were able to use to help us to communicate better.

The bottom line is it was work and it took time. We often spent hours preparing, studying, and practicing. We were committed to change our lifestyles and our way of living to maintain our family and communication. Our son was worth it and we don't regret one minute. Douglas now talks constantly; he is a mimic and has an amazing memory. He can watch a movie and recite it; he hears a song and can sing it. And he does! But we waited a long time to hear that beautiful voice and every syllable and tone is blessed and wonderful. We don't look at Autism as a curse or an illness anymore; we now have a saying in our family. Autism: God's gift to help families communicate better.